So Thanksgiving break was great. Fantastic, in fact! There was family, friends, and food! (man, look at that alliteration). Awesomeness and peace. A wonderful break. However, once Sunday came I was dreading driving the three hours back to Wartburg and being back at college in general.
One of my friends goes to Southern Illinois University in Edwardsville. I love her to death, and I missed her bunches. But once I started talking to her about college I realized I wasn't having the greatest experience at college. While hanging out with her she was texting and emailing her friends from college. I didn't feel the urge to text any of my friends from here. Texting them about anything other than when we're eating seems strange. I began to compare and despair on college experiences. I've never been to a college party. My friends don't stay up late with me talking or watching movies. I don't go out on the weekends or leave campus much at all! WHAT KIND OF COLLEGE LIFE AM I LIVING?!?!
So after that I convinced myself I hated college. Well, maybe not college, but Wartburg. I told myself that I don't have close friends here. There aren't enough opportunities here other than my academics. I don't have fun here ever. Right before leaving I told my mom that we might need to look into transferring schools. I was serious. And I cried a lot of the way home.
But now that it's Thursday and I've gotten back into the swing of college I love it here. I think I've had more fun this week than I have this entire semester. I've been a lot more social, while still being productive, and I have been more open to actually loving it here.
For example, on Tuesday night I went Christmas shopping with my lovely roommate, Abby. We scored big deals at Goodwill and decorated our room. It's Christmas, yo. And Christmas makes me happy. Then last night we actually had people hang out in our room!!! Like, seriously. People never hang out in our room. We don't know why because it's a pretty awesome room. Especially with the Christmas decorations. We just sat in our room and talked for a loooong time. We were gonna watch a movie, but I was fine drinking hot chocolate. And then it got emotional. Solution? Oreo cereal. Yeah, it's a real thing and two people consumed it that were participating in this awesome hangout last night. I guess that the past two days I've started to actually connect to people here and realize that awesomeness does exist outside of my hometown.
So there's that. I've decided that college is what I make it. Prior to break I was so focused on my studies and a set routine. But once I talked to other people at home about their college experiences I realized I was shutting out social opportunities. I wasn't building relationships because I wasn't allowing my relationships to be a construction zone (great metaphor, right? ehh...). Sure, college isn't all about the social life, but I might as well get to know the people that are around me every day. Otherwise there's not really a chance for me to like it here at all.
And now I am starting to. Great timing right? 2 weeks before a long break I realize I like it here. Oh well. This way I'll be able to start the New Year over with some awesome resolutions which include, but are not limited to, enjoying the college life.
When one is naturally introverted, it is easy to fall into the trap of living in your own mind. It may surprise you, but nearly all college professors are naturally introverted. We spent most of our college learning how to live partially extroverted lives and create a balance between the intellectual life and the celebratory life. I wish you best of luck in finding that balance because it is unique to every person.
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